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Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Hi peeps. piglet here...

I don't know why but I suddenly feel like posting.

I have this feeling... This feeling I had everyday last year during the period when 38ma'ams just took over. [I could say it was one of the darkest moments of my life. Life was just so depressing and all I could think of everyday is -- tiaolou]

I don't know why I'm blogging here but I guess I'm still back to square 1 -- relieving over the blog.

I'm blogging here because there's nothing jian bu de ren.

I don't know why I'm feeling like that. It was kind of sudden yal know.
I was still happy this afternoon. [this was what happened during da dark period. I wake up in the morning feeling best and until night I get more and more depressed. That's where I got my "Everyday is a new day" because I feel happy every morning.]

Hey! but this time's different! it's just some things that squadmates told me and then I got pissed and don't know what happened, I suddenly became like that. I was still being my normal self cursing and complaining to my sis about _____

I don't know what caused this, but this feeling is bad. I haven't had this kind of feeling ever since... I don't know.
But I'm quite positive it's caused by _____. I don't know... Not sure.

Haiz... first time I'm feeling depressed after such a long time. Or am I just feeling sian?
Squadmates repeated seeing *** at J8 to me like trice in 3 different convers at 3 different periods of time yesterday and today and everytime I will have reaction [?] [not only on the conver.] I start slapping my lap feeling angry with myself for not being to make it for unit hike and yet screwed up my organ exam. [I wouldn't feel that bad if I did well for my test. Coz I would have felt more worthit. damn this]

Cong ti2 qi3 the same event just now. By right, I should have reaction, but I don't know why, I just couldn't and didn't feel like. hahas. so I simply replied "sorry, but I'm not in the mood to react now..." [I don't know why... She's looking forward to seeing my reaction when I'm in the mood]

haiz. I don't know. Everytime squadmates start talking about unit hike online, it sounds so fun, and I feel like crying. [it reminds me of my organ test. more details in the happy family blog if you wanna know how badly I screwed up]

Went to __________'s blog just now. Squadmates couldn't get in coz there was password but I don't know why [ maybe blogger has gone crazy..] I got in without having to type password. and I cried reading it. haiz. Though I must say that she's too much a thinker [she thinks too profoundly of simple things] it was really really touching. Although it wasn't about us [it was about her squadmates], I think it applies to everyone in nynp. *shrugs* I have tong2 gan3. and it was a particular sentence that made me cry.

Okay. enough of destressing. I just want to say that

Now I finally understand. Yes, I understand and it's not your fault.
I totally understand how yal felt just like how I am feeling now.
Glad you said it out instead of keeping us in the dark.
we learnt. and we love yal.

[btw, this has nothing to do with the post.]

kawaii!;
9:17 PM